People use the phrase "New Year, New Me" as if the clock striking midnight every December 31st is the only catalyst for making changes to your life. I completely disagree. Every waking moment of your life is an opportunity to change, to try again, to set new goals, and evolve to become a better you. Every second, minute, hour of you day is a fresh start. Treasure it.
1. You are not responsible for fixing other people's problems. Refer them to a therapist.
2. Planning is always a useful tool, but when it comes to the future, no amount of planning can prepare you for what is actually going to unfold. Everything will fall into place eventually.
3. The trauma you have endured is not your fault, but it is your responsibility to take a good hard look at the cards you've been dealt (no matter how shitty) and try your damn best to rise above it.
4. Only time, effort, and patience will curate change and help you grow.
5. Walk away from those who are toxic to you and your development regardless of how long you've known them or how much you love them.
6. Recognize when you are the one exhibiting toxic traits and put in the work needed to improve yourself for the better of you and those around you.
7. Every relationship, platonic, sexual, familial, or romantic, is a bond between two people. If you are the only one putting in effort to keep that bond, please reconsider the relationship and have an open conversation about how you feel. If the other party still refuses to put in the work needed for the relationship to thrive, consider walking away.
8. The person you are now is not shaped by your trauma, heartbreak, or failures. It is shaped by your resilience and determination to overcome these obstacles.
9. You don't need a relationship to make you happy. You don't need some extravagant job to make you happy. You don't need a shit ton of money to make you happy. You're good on your own.
10. You can absolutely achieve anything. You climbed out of that 1000 foot deep hole using a staircase made with mismatched parts, bleeding and crying, but you made it. You made it. And if you can do that, you can do anything.
11. Timelines are a joke. Everyone moves at their own pace and societal ideals are stupid. I know your potential. I know how much you're capable of. You will be able to achieve your dreams. You will. It's just a matter of time.
12. Reconciliation is possible. It takes humility and swallowing your pride.
13. Do not interact with that clown on Twitter. You'll only get angry and feel emotionally drained.
14. The sea of emotions is a rough ride. Your baseline is so much higher than your lowest lows that you may feel like you're bipolar but you're not. I truly hope that your lows will never get that low ever again.
15. The quiet tranquility of late night writing sessions bring you an amount of joy that you didn't know was possible.
16. Due to COVID19, the world erupted into a racial war against Chinese people and Asians in general, revealing a lot of pent of racial discrimination and hatred. But also because of COVID 19, people realized how important health is and how much of our basic necessities we truly take for granted day by day such as toilet paper, sanitary products, food, soap, and hand sanitizer. The world had to experience for spoonies and others with chronic pain conditions or other disabilities have to endure on a daily basis when they have to cancel on plans and stay home not because they want to, but because they have to.
17. You have myalgic encephelomyalitis, fibromyalgia, sleep apnea, and chronic migraines. This makes your day to day much more difficult and very different from the average person. Do not ever compare yourself to other people and to what you "should" be doing. You're trying your best, and that is enough.
18. Life is full of variables and surprises, but I don't want to be one of them. I don't want my happiness and my identity to be one of them. Be yourself. Be completely and 100% yourself.
19. Connections can be made in all sorts of ways and sometimes people you meet through online support can be just as close as those you meet in person.
20. People change, definitions change, you change. You're an ever evolving human being. Sexuality is fluid, experimental, and intimidating, but it is all a part of learning how to navigate through life.
21. You know what you are meant to do. It's the very thing that keeps you up all night, words pouring into your laptop, and smiling to yourself with that midnight cup of coffee.
22. Finally finding your passions and being confident that those are indeed your passions feels overwhelming and slightly terrifying, but also so incredibly exciting.